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Shopping with Children:

Kids can be a real handful when shopping with you. They want everything they see, and they have a hard time understanding the concept of why you won't buy them what they want. They have a tendency to believe that if they just ask enough (and this may be whether you have given in on previous shopping trips, or not), that you will eventually give in and buy them what they want. They still don't really understand if you say you don't have the money to buy something, they still have rather short memories, so they don't even remember that they aren't getting a toy because they misbehaved last week. No matter what you tell them, they are usually all hands, wanting everything they see. While there's no way to completely avoid your child begging you for toys all the time, there are a few things you can do to prevent them from doing it at least sometimes:

• Let them mark the list—if your child can read, this is a great way to keep their mind occupied while you shop. Give them the shopping list and let them mark it off as you get the items. If they are reading and writing well, you can even give them the pad and pen on the way to the store and list off things for them to write on the list. Then, they will feel like it is their list, and it means even more when they get to mark the items off.

• Let them help you—if your child still can't read yet, you can still let them help you. You can let them walk with you through the isle and tell them what to get off the shelves for you. Often, if a child is busy helping you fill the basket with things you actually need, they are less apt to fill the basket with things they want.

• Take them to a family-friendly store—some stores are much more family-friendly than others. Some stores have carts where kids can ride in big seats on the front of the cart, some have carts that have little vehicles made on to the front of them so that the kids can ride inside, and a trip to the store is like a trip to play, and some even have miniature carts that are child-size, and the children are allowed to really shop. Going to a place such as this makes the shopping itself more interesting for your child, so buying stuff isn't as big of a deal.

• Buy them one thing—one way to avoid being harassed for many toys is to decide in advance that you will buy your child one thing. Even at a really young age, children can count to one, and they will almost always be able to stick to that number without too much difficulty. If you do this, you will need to tell your child before you ever go to the store that they are allowed one toy, and one only. Then, the first thing they see that they want, let them hold it. If they see something else that they want later, tell them they have to pick, and if they pick the new one, put the first toy back up. If you do this on several occasions, and you always stick to the number you say, it makes it easier for those times when you won't be buying them anything. You can tell them (several times) before you arrive that they will not be getting anything. Tell them they can look at toys and they can be thinking of what they would like to buy next time you come to the store, but that no matter how many times they ask you, they are not getting anything. Tell them that if they ask a bunch, they will get toys at home taken away (then, of course, if they don't listen, you have to follow through on whatever punishment threatened). This will not always work, of course, but if you try it, you might be surprised to see how well it does work.

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